Posted in goals

What Big Goals Do That Little Goals Don’t

“Become a millionaire not for the million dollars, but for what it will make of you to achieve it.”— Jim Rohn

I love this quote and it can be applied to anything, not just wealth.

Working toward a goal, a really big one, a ginormous goal, grows you into a person that you would not become otherwise.  It transforms you.

It causes you to work smarter, learn more, show up in a big way, builds character, grit and determination.

Little goals don’t do that for you.  Little goals keep you moving and can keep you busy, maybe even distracting, but they don’t transform you.

In fact, if your goal doesn’t transform you, it might not be a goal at all, it might be a task or a project, and that’s OK as long as you weren’t expecting a major transformation.

I knew I wanted to compete with horses when we started our horse adventure 7 years ago — but I underestimated all of the things that becoming a competitive horsewoman would do for me, I also underestimated everything I’d need to learn and become as well.

Transformational goals teach you…

  • How to learn and become a great student.
  • How to generate and duplicate results.
  • How to show up in the world differently.
  • How to be with uncomfortable emotions.
  • How to define and redefine yourself.
  • How to manage your thoughts differently.
  • How to count on yourself, have your own back and be your biggest fan.
  • How to cheer generously for others and their success.
  • How to give praise and how to receive compliments and criticism.
  • How to develop patience, empathy, grace and gratitude.
  • How failure is nothing but a timing issue.
  • How to let go and how to hang on.
  • How to develop your instincts and trust yourself.
  • How to feel the fear and do it anyway.

What you learn and become is far more important than accomplishments.  In fact, if you over-attach yourself to your accomplishments, you’ll get fixated in your ego, you will get stuck.

Celebrate for a moment and then reset, calibrate and orchestrate a new goal.

What unrealistic goal are you trying to accomplish?

What is an unrealistic goal that you could pursuit that would facilitate the greatest transformation?  Do that!

Now go be a goal setting, goal getting, goal digger!!!

photo credit:  Mary Lou Kultgen ~thank you Mary Lou!~




Posted in goals

Letting Go

Sometimes, in order to achieve your goal, you have to let go of the when and the how but hang on the belief that you can and will.

In my previous blog, I talked about wanting to “get the buckle” at the WDAA World Show in 2017 with Kit.  It’s a good read, check it out.  Well, I didn’t get the buckle at that show but…keep reading.

What I want you to understand is that just because you don’t hit your target, you didn’t fail, it’s a timing issue.  Maybe you got the how and when wrong and that’s OK.

Last year one of my friends was pursuing her bronze medal in dressage.  I remember being at one of the shows in which the score came in just a sliver too low, I mean, she missed it by a hair.  How disappointing for her, but a few months later she tried again.

This time, she slayed her ride and nailed the score, I mean hit it out of the park.  She earned her medal by a landslide, not a sliver.  She didn’t give up just because she missed it previously. The moment she got her score was incredibly emotional, it’s a difficult process to earn a medal and the obstacles she had to overcome were not easy.

You can’t get too attached to the how and the when you will attain what you desire because you just never know.  Be actively growing into the person who has achieved your goal, practice being that person today, do what that person does, learn what that person has learned.  Become the version of yourself that already has what you desire.

Practice being your higher self today!

So back to my buckle story…the story ends like this; I got my buckle but not how I thought or when I thought.  At the year end awards for the show season, I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the award for Basic Level Champion was a buckle, and I won it.  The irony continues however, the horse I earned it on was not Kit, it was Baby J.

Now go be a goal setting, goal getting, goal digger!!!

Posted in goals

“Only Those Who Risk Going Too Far Know How Far They Can Go” ~T.S. Elliot

It’s so fascinating that whenever we start to think about something that we want to do, something that we want to accomplish, our brain goes into what I call, motivational triad triage.

Remember, your brain wants to seek pleasure, avoid pain and conserve energy.

Whatever “the thing” is that you want to do, will require you learn something new or change a habit.  It will for sure require more energy and that’s not OK with your brain.

Your brain wants to do what is familiar, easy, and for sure always pleasurable.  It likes your old habits, even if they are crappy ones that are bad for you.

I remember so vividly all of the thoughts that I had around showing Kit at the Western Dressage World Show for the first time in 2015 and how different my thoughts were leading up to the  second show in 2016 and for sure the third show in 2017 was a stark contrast.

The first year my thoughts were, “Who do you think you are?”  “You don’t know what you are doing.”  You can’t possibly think you can do this, you are just getting your feet wet.”  “You are just here to learn, no one is going to take you seriously.” “You have never done this before.” “Kit is just a racehorse.”

The second year my thoughts were, “Last year was beginners luck.” “What if you don’t do as well this year as you did last year?”  “What will people say?” “People will find out you don’t know what you are doing.”  “They will think you are an idiot.”

I failed ahead of time, not once but twice.  Justifying, just in case I showed up crappy.

By the end of the second World Show, I knew I had to change my thoughts if I wanted to do a third World Show.  I was running out of steam physically and mentally I was on empty.  I was not disappointed with the outcomes at all, in fact I was incredibly proud but I still had thoughts that I could not shake and they were stealing the joy out of the experience.

That’s what negative thoughts do, they steal your joy!

The first thing I did was get very clear about what I wanted as an outcome.  I wrote down exactly what success was going to look like.  I wrote out how I would feel and what I would think, and dare I say, I wrote down that I wanted the dadgum buckle!

I didn’t want to just get my feet wet, or just have fun or just get experience.  Sure I wanted those things, but success would like a buckle, and it would look like a mentally healthy horse and rider, a physically healthy horse and rider, it would look like every ride  blew my own mind.  Success looked like me showing up 100% knowing I belonged there.  I was going to show up like I wanted the buckle.  I was going to train like it and show up like it.  That was my commitment to Kit and to me.

So instead of investing in the negative self-talk, I invested in all of the thoughts that said we could do this, that it was possible.

We always have a choice of looking at what is possible and investing in those thoughts, but our human default is to look at all of the ways that we can fail or what we have to lose and we get very attached to those thoughts.  We hang on to those thoughts like they are our life line.

Whatever we spend the most time thinking about is what forms our core beliefs and our core beliefs create our habits and our habits create our outcomes

But the good news is that when we focus on what is possible, our brain starts working towards that.   You intuition takes over and starts figuring things out, starts showing you the way.  Your gut instinct kicks in and decisions are made that support your outcomes and your grit grows and you start taking massive action toward your intentional outcomes.

When it got too hot, my intuition said, “let’s change the schedule up.”  When I was tired, my intuition said, “a break will do you both good.”  When I would get frustrated my intuition would remind me to do my thought work.  When self-doubt would creep in, I didn’t give it any authority and I managed my thoughts to support my habits and my habits supported my goals.

Sometimes, we humans think our goals should be easy, and comfortable, and that we won’t experience discomfort, and that all of our thoughts will be roses and sunshine with rainbows and unicorns.  That’s not true.

If your goals don’t stretch you, they aren’t goals, they are tasks.

Goals should make you take steps out of your comfort zone, they should teach you things, they should energize you.  They should make you grow, create impact in your life, evolve you.

To achieve your goals you are going to have to do things even when you really don’t want to.  You might have to get up at 5 am because it’s too hot to ride at night.  You might have to call 20 people today to make your sales goal when you would rather watch TV.  You might have to do your long run today even though you would rather go shopping.  You might have to eat healthy when everyone else is eating junk.

Your willingness to be uncomfortable is your currency to success.  Growth is never without at least a little discomfort.

So how do we move from wanting and wishing to doing and pursing that thing?

  1. Be very clear about your goal.  What does success look like?  How will you know if you were successful?  What does it feel like when you are successful?  What are your emotions when you hit your goal?  What are your thoughts about your success?  Write it all out in detail.  Read this daily.
  2. As you write out the detail of your goal, write down all of the thoughts and emotions that come up for you. What is the tone of voice that your inner critic is using?  What are the words?  What is the tone?  What exactly is she trying to protect you from?  What does the feeling feel like in our body?
  3. Write down all of the ways that you benefit on the journey of pursuing your goal? What all will you have to learn?  How much knowledge will you acquire?  Who will you become along the way?  How will you grow?  Financially?  Physically?  Mentally?  Spiritually?  Relationally?
  4. Who else benefits on your journey? Does your journey benefit anyone?  Think about it. Do you have to buy anything, take lessons?  Will your growth positively affect someone else?
  5. Do the “As long as”/ “Even if” exercise.                                                                                   I will commit to ______________ as long as it’s easy, as long as I look smart, as long as I win etc…                                                                                                                                      I will commit to ______________even if it’s hard, even if I am tired, even if no one like it, even if I am scared, even if I fail.  This will measure your commitment.            Think of as many statements as possible.  If you have more as long as statements, you may not have the commitment that you need right now, and that’s OK.  This is not to beat yourself up but to enlighten you to what it is that you really, really want.  I mean really, really, really want.
  6. Go back to #1, look at the emotion that you expect to feel when you hit your goal. Where in your life do you or have you felt that before?  Look for evidence of those emotions and how you can access them today.
  7. The thoughts that you will think when you hit your goal are available to you today.  In fact, you need to start practicing them now.  Your thoughts become your core beliefs that create your habits that support your outcomes.

So, how did the 3rd World Show go?  I didn’t win the buckle but I sure as dang sure made sure that I showed up like I wanted it.  We ended up 3rd again this year and it was an incredible journey.  This year (2017) success looked like this; my horse was happy and healthy going into the show and after the show, she was amazing and seemed to enjoy herself too.  I was happy and healthy going into the show and after the show, I had enough mental and physical energy to continue with a few more shows and we even showed up a level.  I felt like every ride blew my mind with how connected we were and in the end, the score wasn’t the most important measure of success, it was my thoughts.

Listen, I know this stuff is not easy and blogs tend to way over simplify things.  Don’t hesitate to ping me if you want to talk about your goals.  It’s my favorite subject!

Now go be a goal setting, goal getting, goal digging, goal getter!!!

Photo credit goes to Camille Fuller who captures the most amazing moments.  Thanks Camille!

Posted in goals

Big Program Announcement!!!!!

You do not want to miss the free live training event happening beginning June 7th.

So far this year I have hosted 3 weight loss master classes.  I had the pleasure of teaching 16 beautiful ladies how to convert their bodies from sugar burner to fat burner.

Here is what happened:

  • Weight loss happened
  • More energy happened
  • No more brain fog happened
  • More mental sharpness happened
  • Appetite hormones reset happened
  • Metabolism reset happened
  • Learned how to eat without dieting happened
  • Handled cravings and urges happened
  • Controlling the food chatter happened
  • Self confidence happend
  • Self-love happend

And now, it can all happen to you!

The month of June I will offer 4 live training events via Zoom.  During the live training I will teach you and give you some things to do from week to week that will get you started on your fat burner journey.  Then I will open it up to live coaching Q&A’s.

We will be meeting via Zoom every Thursday from 7:00 to 8:00 beginning June 7th. .

You can invest 60 minutes a week in YOU!!!

How to join the Master Class:

  • Click on “Heck Ya” 
  • A few days before the first session, I will be sending you a conference call meeting invite with the dial in information in a separate email.
  • On June 7th and all Thursdays in June,  you will connect to the call using the link provided.  (With Zoom, you can do this from your iPhone, Computer, or iPad)

In the meantime…put some thought and I mean deep, deep thought into what you want and why you want it.

Go deep, that’s where all the good stuff is!

Wait, did I mention that it is free? 

Why on earth would I do that?

I want to put as much value out into the universe this year and this Master Class is totally going to help me complete that goal.

I am on a mission people!

I do hesitate offering this for free because sometimes, unless we pay for it we don’t understand the value of it.  I am believing in you all and that you will see the value and I am offering this for free!

In fact, if you know someone benefit from this Master Class, you can forward this email to them.  They will need to click on Heck Ya to be enrolled and receive the call in information.

We are going to do some high impact and transformational work over four weeks.

I hope that you are as excited as I am!



Posted in goals

Last Scarcity Blog & Program Announcement

Chances are pretty good that you have a scarcity mindset.  It’s quite normal and part of the brain’s motivational strategy to avoid pain.

It’s not your fault.  A scarcity mindset is woven throughout our lives and society.

Scarcity is just a belief in a limited supply of anything – food, water, money, resources, time or relationships.  It can show up anywhere!  If it does show up anywhere, chances are it shows up at least a little bit everywhere.

I was surprised to expose my own scarcity mindset recently and now that I am aware, I am noticing how it shows up in the craziest ways.

The more I learn about it, the more I want to know about it.

The best news is that you can overcome and reverse and allow abundance at any time you choose.

With that, I am choosing abundance, and I am going to create a program to show you how you can too.

This is such a huge topic and way too much to blog about.  There will be a program, probably at the end of fall, first part of winter season.   For sure, after horse show season.

I do have a highly impactful Weight Loss Master Class that I am launching on June 7th that you do not want to miss.  It’s free, only 4 weeks, one hour a week, and it’s going to be the last diet you ever do.  Click here to read all about it and sign up for the updates.

Goal diggers…I am on a mission to see some major transformations this year.  Don’t miss this!

Weight Loss Master Class June 2018

Now go be a goal getting, abundant, goal digger!!!

Posted in goals, motivation

Scarcity! Who? Me?

Do you walk around wondering if there is enough oxygen for you and me and the world?  You might, but probably not.  Why not?  Because we have a mindset of abundance when it comes to oxygen.  We might question the quality but not the availability.

Now, imagine we are scuba diving.  Suddenly I experience a malfunction of some sort and you need to share your oxygen with me.  I bet your mind would immediately go to thoughts of “what if I don’t have enough for me?”

Totally normal by the way.  Not offended.

This is a great illustration of the difference between a scarcity mindset and an abundant mindset.

You can almost feel the anxiety and stress of a diver having to share oxygen, scarcity.  In contrast, we go through our days not even thinking about how much oxygen there is. You can also feel the freedom and ease of not worrying about oxygen and knowing that there is plenty for everyone, abundance.

How does this show up in the work place?

The scarcity mindset has a very difficult time sharing recognition, sharing credit and being happy for anyone else’s good fortune.  We can feel like their gain is our lack, or that there isn’t enough for everyone and someone else just got the best part.  There is a sense of a lack of resources and few options to choose from.

An abundant mindset, in contrast flows out of a deep sense of self-worth and security.  It comes from a place of plenty for everyone.  It easily and genuinely shares in prestige and recognition and is open to possibilities, options, alternatives and creativity.

How does this show up in other areas?

  • Maybe we become jealous of the amount of time one friend spends with another.
  • Maybe we are trying to lose weight but can’t fathom throwing food away so we consume it.
  • We go out go out to eat and immediately order the cheapest thing on the menu.
  • Maybe we talk negatively about someone who just bought the house of their dreams or the car of their dreams or just got the job of their dreams.
  • Maybe we feel rushed and often feel like we are running behind.
  • We feel lonenly or have a need, but don’t want to “put anyone out.”

What’s the problem with a scarcity mindset?   Doesn’t seem incredibly harmful right?


A scarcity mindset is a fear-based thought loop.  It’s a thought error.  It makes you show up small, it illustrates your lack of self-worth, it steals your joy from living, and helps you make horrible decisions.  It keeps you from experiencing all the abundance that the world has to offer.

You can’t invite more into a mindset of lack.

What to do?

I have three tools you can use immediately to start showing up with an abundant mindset.

  1. Awareness  Of course, awareness is key to everything.  You can’t fix what you don’t know is broken.   Be aware of complaining, criticizing, condemning others.  Be aware of the company that you keep, mindsets are contagious.
  1. Attitude of gratitude  Choose to see all that you have.  Gratitude actually positively rewires the pathways of your brain.  When you switch your thoughts from “I want” to “I have”, cool stuff happens.  Try it.  See the message in the mess.
  1. Give  It may feel counterintuitive but the best way to feel abundant is to give.  Give what you want more of.  If you feel underappreciated, offer appreciation to someone else.  Don’t feel like you have enough time to get your stuff done?  Help someone get something off of their plate.  Don’t feel like you have enough money?  Give to someone less fortunate, and there is always someone less fortunate.  Giving put you into an abundant mindset almost immediately.

Now go be an abundant, goal getting, goal digger!!!



Posted in goals

I’m Not Jealous, I Have a Scarcity Mindset

I am going to be really diving into the abundant mindset to help you and me create a more abundant life.   Can I get a yipppeeee???

I am so fascinated with what I have learned about my own scarcity thoughts while doing some of my own thought work and models.  What the heck?  I thought for sure that I was in a good place with so many topics like food, time, money, relationships.

Turns out…I have work to do.  The truth is, we all do!

How do you know if you have a scarcity mindset? Well, do any of these apply to you?

  • Unable to take a compliment
  • You are jealous of others good fortune (you find it hard to be happy for them)
  • You use words like I can’t or I don’t have or I want
  • Your thoughts always move to finances
  • Clutter (you hold on to things just in case)
  • Complaining (you may not even hear it)
  • Procrastination
  • Distracted easily
  • Busy, Busy, Busy
  • Feeling rushed often

Scarcity is a state of mind, a loop of negative thoughts rooted in fear.  Not only do we fear not having enough but we fear not being enough.  Fear causes anxiety.  Fear based thoughts lead us to make horrible choices and that leads us to horrible results.

What does this have to do with goals?  Everything my friend, everything!

When I talk about goals to anyone, I can usually count on the following intentions:

  • I want more time
  • I want more freedom
  • I want to make more money
  • I want to lose more weight
  • I want more from my relationships

Hmmmm….I am seeing a common thread here.  When we come from a place of not having instead of a place of what we have, we feel less than.  When we feel less than, we show up that way.  When we show up less than, that is exactly what we get!

We are going to go deep folks.  Deep into the caverns of scarcity.  We are going to call it out, name it for what it is and blow our own minds with abundant outcomes!!!

Stay tuned for a ride on the bus of abundance and growth mindset thinking.

Now, go be a goal getting, abundance living, goal digger!!!



Posted in goals

Goals Manifesto *repost*

Goals are meant to give your life direction, dimension, and texture.

Goals are meant to guide you on the path of becoming the person that you want to be, exactly how you want to show up.

Goals are not about where you come from, but where you are going.

Goals are not only about what you have or have not accomplished, but what is possible.

Goals are not meant to defeat, but to inspire.

Goals are not going to motivate you, you must move forward and invite motivation to follow.

Merely having a goal will not get you to the destination.

Missing the target or destination by your specified time is not a measure of failure, it’s a matter of timing.

As much as achievement counts, who I become along the way is by far more significant.

There is no end-point, I will always be striving for growth in different areas of my life at different times.

I accept that with every goal achieved I will have a different level of responsibility and for that reason, I will be responsible with the goals that I set.

“In 2018 my objectives will be met because I am going to carefully choose and manage my thoughts by selecting the appropriate emotions that will serve me. By being selective in my emotions I will choose actions that support my goals and as a result I will achieve and exceed my own expectations.”

Posted in goals, motivation

I Thought I Would Feel Different. What’s Wrong With Me?

Has this every happened to you?

You land your dream job, or married your dream man, or you got weight off, or you just scratched off that big goal and you thought to yourself, “I should feel differently, I should feel happy and satisfied, but I don’t.”  Continue reading “I Thought I Would Feel Different. What’s Wrong With Me?”

Posted in goals

I Totally Disagree!!

I saw a quote that said, “Life doesn’t give you what you want, it gives you what you deserve.”

I totally disagree with that quote.  No one deserves to live in pain, fear, loneliness or poverty.  We were all born 100% worthy of soooooo much more.

My belief is that “Life doesn’t give you what you want, it gives you who you are, how you think, how you feel, and how you show up in the world.”

If you look at your life and really evaluate your results, you can work backwards through the thought model and find the exact thought that is a self-limiting belief, creating this self-fulfilling prophecy.

The good news is that self-fulfilling prophecy works the other direction too.  You can attract opportunities to you and you can attract the people in your life that become conduits to your goals and ambitions.  You can turn this ship around.

It starts with how you think, what you think, how you feel and how you want to show up in this world.

Stop thinking you are getting the life that you deserve and start thinking about the life that you want, the person that you want to become, the value that you want to put out into the universe.

Think about that.

Now go be a thought thinking, goal getting, goal digger!!!

Posted in goals

It’s Not My Fault That You Are Making Me Miserable

I love everything about the thought model. I love that it has everything to do with achieving the results that you want in life.

Your brain is an amazing tool and you get to use it as you wish.

Here it is in a nutshell:
Circumstances trigger thoughts,
Thoughts trigger emotions,
Emotions become the fuel for action or even non-action
Actions or Non-Actions Drive results
The results line is 100% the reason that this thought model is so dadgum important!! Continue reading “It’s Not My Fault That You Are Making Me Miserable”

Posted in goals

Sweetie, You are the Secret Sauce

OK, we are one quarter of the way through the year and I am wondering how your goals are going?

Are they going or are they gone or did they even get launched?

Did you set goals? If not, why not?

Maybe you don’t feel worthy…what??? You were born worthy!

Maybe you don’t think you have time…that’s a good one. We make time for what is important to us or we fill up our lives with nonsense to give us an excuse.

Maybe you don’t know how…another good one. You don’t have to know how, you only have to know why.

Maybe you have been telling yourself, “one day when….” The time is right now, this second.

Maybe you don’t think you should be so self-indulgent…You are already indulging yourself by using everyone else and everything else as an excuse.  Nice try though.

Maybe you struggle with the “what” because when you start thinking about the “how” you freak out…if your goals don’t make you freak out, you aren’t dreaming big enough. Freak Out! Then do it anyway.

Maybe you can’t even imagine a “what” because that freaks you out…See above.

What story is standing between you and yours goals?

Are you searching for the secret sauce?  Sweetie, you are the secret sauce!  No one can do what you do the way that you do it.  The world needs your work out in the universe.

Are you hoping your dream will just show up one day and say “I’m here?”

I know what it’s like to just sit around hoping that one day something will be different and someday I will be able, (aka motivated) to focus on what I want for me.

I know what it’s like to think that goals and dreams are for other people, the kids, the spouse, the friends, but not for me.

I know what it’s like to tell yourself a story so that you don’t have to take responsibility for what you get your life.  Did I just say that? Yep!

I know, I did it too!

The only thing that was keeping me from pursuing my goals and dreams was me, and the stories that I told myself.

My self-limiting beliefs about me and my worth kept me sitting on the couch, drinking beer, eating Cheetos and watching TV, all while hoping tomorrow would be different.

The only one holding you back is you! What are you waiting for?

If you need help, just ping me.

Now go be a goal setting, goal working, goal getting goal digger!

Posted in goals

Your Future You!

Your past does not define you or create your future…so stop going there!

We spend a lot of time wishing we had made better decisions, different choices etc…that kind of thinking does not serve you and robs you of your future self.

You know what looking back gets you?  A sore neck!  I know, that was so lame.  So something my dad would have said.

Your future you is available to you now.

That person that wants to travel that country explore that opportunity, create that thing, read that book, write that book, start that  business, scale that business, run that race, ski that slope, smell that ocean, climb that mountain, ride that bike, lift that weight, lose that weight for good…that person is available to you right now.

You know that thing that you have always wanted to do?  Go do it!

Now, go be a goal getting, goal digger!

Posted in goals

I was a Beer Drinking, Cheetos Eating…

Got goals?

Maybe you don’t even know where to start, that’s common and quite normal.

Maybe you don’t think that you can reach your goal, so why have one, why bother?

I call that, failing ahead of time.

Maybe you spend more time thinking about the things that you would like to do rather than actually doing them.

Totally human.

Maybe you let yourself off the hook by thoughts like “I don’t have time, or I don’t have talent, or I don’t have the money or resources. I have too many reasons why not to even think about the possibility.”

I know those thoughts because I had them. I had them all!

I was a beer drinking, Cheetos eating, ET watching individual.  No, not the movie Extra Terrestrial…Entertainment Tonight.

For my stretch goal, I would pick the weeds out of my yard…by hand.   Woohoo!

I could not, for the life of me, understand why I was OK with that.  Why didn’t I put myself out there, why didn’t I have goals and ambition and passion for something, what the heck was going on? What was wrong with me?

Turns out it was because I was human and had a brain…totally normal!!

My brain was wired to think the life that I wanted to live was too risky to go for.  It might mean that I would feel fear and rejection, anxiety, stress, sadness, that life might be challenging.  I had doubts about my value and worth.  So instead, I watched others, on TV, I watched their lives.  I lived through them.

Sounds depressing doesn’t it?  Actually, I wasn’t depressed at all.  Until I picked up a shelf-help book (that was not a typo), and began to read.  You see, I thought I could just read the books and feel better, do better, be better.

Turns out that you have to actually do the work and apply the work.

Crazy stuff I know but, unless you apply the work, it’s only a shelf-help book, and by the way, there is a reason it’s called “self-help.”  

I read, “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill.  He said things like “the starting point of achievement is desire.”

What did I desire? I had not even thought about it.  I knew what I didn’t want.  I didn’t want to be a burden to society, I didn’t want to be alone, I didn’t want to be talked about or laughed at, I didn’t want to feel bad and I didn’t want…

I only knew what I didn’t want, but I had no idea what I did want.  I desired to avoid pain, I was moving away from things that I didn’t want instead of moving toward things that I did want.

Another life changing statement was, “Set your mind on a definite goal and observe how quickly the world stands aside to let you pass.”  Born my obsession with goal setting!

And then this one…“Put your foot upon the neck of the fear of criticism by reaching a decision not to worry about what other people think, do, or say.”


So how did I go from living at the effect of my circumstances to living a life by design, a life on purpose?

Lots and lots of thought work.  I mean tons of it, still do.  I read as many books and I could, some of them are on my website so go check them out.

Then I had to learn to apply the work.  That is the hard part.  I had to stop waiting for life to happen and I had to start making life happen.

I had to show up bigger, put myself out there and be the person that was willing to be uncomfortable.

I had to learn that anything I wanted to feel was available to me by what I was thinking, then I had to learn how to manage what I was thinking, I am still learning…

I learned that whatever I focused on the most became reality.  Good or bad, it came to be.

Is my life perfect?  Heck no!  It never will be because I am not perfect, and life isn’t perfect and I don’t think that it is supposed to be.

Life is up and it’s down, it’s happy and it’s sad, it’s scary and it’s exciting, it’s difficult and it’s forgiving.

It’s a contrast in colors and emotions and thoughts.

That’s what adds texture and flavor to our lives.

It’s how we know we are living.

I still have fear of rejection and anxiety about tons of things, but I have learned that all of that is our humanness so that we can appreciate peace of mind, love, kindness, empathy, relevance and assurance when we are fortunate enough to experience that.

So, what do you desire?  What do you spend your time thinking about?  What is that nudge you feel from the universe every so often?  Are you moving away from something or toward what you desire?

Now, go be a goal setting, goal getting, goal digger!