Most people occasionally experience worry…I am not talking about that kind of worry.
I am talking about those of us who get stuck, mulling over worst case scenario after worst case scenario. I am talking about over-thinking all of the possible outcomes…the really bad ones.
We do this with work, relationships, school performance, finances, health and most anything else that you can imagine. I used to do this to the extreme!!!.
Here is what I want you to understand.
What you worry about is what you are going to create more of. Is that OK with you?
If it is, I will catch you next week. If you want to know more and stop the worry cycle, read on…
Lots of smart people have studied the excessive worrying cycle and here are some interesting findings.
- Some people actually think worrying is a positive thing, it feels like playing it safe, being cautious, even responsible.
- Many equate worrying with problem-solving.
- Some of us believe that worrying protects us on an emotional level. We might think that going from the anticipation of winning to the actuality of losing would be too much range of emotion.
Here is the truth.
- Worry is an indulgent emotion designed to keep you in the cave.
- Worrying never solves a problem in fact, we are less likely to identify a fix for anything from a place of worry. Worry likes to focus our attention on the thing we are most worried about so that we don’t take inspired action toward our goals.
- Worrying does not emotionally prepare anyone for anything. It just creates more worry.
Worrying ahead of time will never make you feel good about a bad outcome. In fact, worrying steals your ability to be present and in the moment.
Trust me…No one ever said, ‘Boy, I am glad I worried about that for two weeks.” Hardly…
In fact, how many times have you thought you actually worried for nothing! I do it all the time.
I remember how worried I would get before a big horse show. Worried about the weather, the travel, forgetting something, how we would do, if I would get sick or be too tired…all the things.
Worry was the thief of my joy. It robbed me from the full on experience of living..
Soooooo, what to do? Glad you asked!
For one thing, learn to trust your ability to be OK no matter what the outcome is. Then learn to trust your ability to cope with the negative emotion of the outcome, no matter what. After all, it’s the emotion that we are truly in fear of. We are worried about feeling rejected, humiliated, abandoned, all the things that come with an adverse outcome.
Be willing to feel it all knowing that the emotion is the worst thing that can happen.
Worry is coming from a thought. Usually a catastrophic one.
Working through worry may mean facing a fear and deciding not to worry about the outcome, just do it anyway. This may mean deciding on purpose to take a fast from worry.
Let’s just decide to not worry. Let’s decide to invite the joy of full on living.
Now, let’s go be a goal setting, goal getting, goal digger.